Have you ever stopped to consider how deeply the reckoning of time is embedded in your consciousness? We humans are constantly juggling three kinds of time: past, present, and future. We anticipate what is about to happen by imagining the future. We react and live in the fleeting present, and we incorporate our memories of the past into a historic tapestry that helps us make sense of it all.

What would you be like if your ability to coordinate past, present, and future time was shattered? What if you lost your ability to keep up with the stream of time? What if you couldn’t remember 10 minutes ago, so you had no way of knowing if you’d been sitting in a chair for few minutes or a few hours?

This kind of memory loss is what our friends with Alzheimer’s live with all the time.

And this is why they cannot take care of themselves but must rely on us for care and support.

When it comes to dealing with memory loss and dementia, particularly those related to Alzheimer’s Disease, my favorite kinds of caregivers are those who understand the limitations of dementia and maintain a sense of humor, dignity, and love.

It does not help people with Alzheimer’s for us to pretend there isn’t a problem. Denial isn’t helpful. Nor is it helpful to give up on them and treat them as if they were a sub-class of humanity.

There are more women caring for men with Alzheimer’s than men caring for women. There are a number of reasons for this, some social and some biological. The biggest reason is that women tend to live longer and be healthier.

But that’s just a statistic. It only helps us understand and expect to find more women in caregiving roles. Men who find themselves called to nurture and care for  spouses with dementia have less support, are less likely to ask for help, and are less likely to have the kind of socialization that nurturers need.

That’s why I was impressed when I heard that the Banner Alzheimer’s Institute is beginning a caregiver support group specifically designed for men.

Click here to read more.

Alzheimer’s Care and Facilities in San Antonio, Texas. AlzCare provides care in loving, home-like settings.